Retro Blood

Retro Blood 171: WoodChipper Massacre (1988)

James Kline and J.H. Alison continue their Killer Objects in 1980s Horror Movies: Part 2 series with the low-budget oddity Woodchipper Massacre. While the movie doesn’t live up to its gruesome title, the boys dive into its home-video style production, giving props to the DIY spirit but lamenting the execution of this so-called horror-comedy.
The episode kicks off with a discussion about the challenges of blending horror and comedy successfully, and why Woodchipper Massacre missed the mark.
Next up is the Retro Blood Weekly History Segment, centered on the film’s release date, January 1, 1988. Alison dives into metal history, highlighting the debut album of L.A. Guns, their party rock vibe, and the band’s origins. Meanwhile, James covers a WWF house show headlined by the unforgettable showdown between Macho Man Randy Savage and the Honky Tonk Man.
Then it’s onto the backstory of Woodchipper Massacre. The hosts delve into John McBride’s all-encompassing role as writer, director, editor, and actor. They discuss the film’s shoestring $400 budget (not counting the camera) and the weekend rental of the titular woodchipper. Plus, they explore McBride’s other work and how it stacks up against this bizarre venture.
Finally, the full review dives into the film’s cringeworthy dialogue, over-the-top acting, and moments that made them want to shut it off. They highlight Aunt Tess and her hilariously out-of-touch one-liners, the sibling trio’s awkward performances, and the most ludicrous woodchipper scenes you’ll ever witness.
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This episode is a must-listen for fans of ultra-low-budget filmmaking and anyone curious about how not to make a horror-comedy. #RetroBlood #WoodchipperMassacre #80sHorror #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic

Retro Blood 170: The Lift (1985)

James Kline and J.H. Alison continue their exploration of Killer Objects in 1980s Horror Movies: Part 2 with the Dutch cult classic, The Lift. Get ready for a wild ride as they break down elevator malfunctions, microchip conspiracies, and the unique vision of filmmaker Dick Maas.
The episode kicks off with quick thoughts on The Lift, including whether people really get stuck in elevators that often, and the surprisingly forward-thinking concept of protein-based microchips in the 1980s.
Next, it’s time for the Retro Blood Weekly History Segment. Using the U.S. release date of July 4, 1985, James highlights WCCW’s Star Wars supercard, including the Independence Star Wars event, and its impact on wrestling history. Meanwhile, Alison dives into the world of metal, discussing Aerosmith's mid-1980s comeback and their place in the music scene at the time.
The boys then dive into the production history of The Lift, covering the exploits of writer/director Dick Maas—yes, that’s his real name. They talk about his infamous firing (and rehiring) by producer Matthijs van Heijningen, his decision to compose the film’s soundtrack himself to save money, and his unique inspirations for the movie’s memorable opening scene (hint: it involves Star Wars). They even touch on Maas’s career in music videos and how his signature style shaped The Lift.
Finally, the full review takes center stage. They discuss Felix, the mechanic-turned-reluctant hero, who seems more interested in beer his reporter sidekick than his own family. The conversation dives into the film’s bizarre mix of corporate conspiracy, foreign villains (hello, Rising Sun Corporation), and microchip mayhem. And, of course, there’s plenty to say about the horny elevator shenanigans and the strange yet iconic tone of this one-of-a-kind horror flick.
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Hop in and hold on—this episode will take you straight to the top of retro horror greatness! #RetroBlood #80sHorror #TheLift #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic
 

Retro Blood 169: Murder By Phone (1982)

Kick off the new year with James Kline and J.H. Alison as Retro Blood dives into Killer Objects in 1980s Horror Movies: Part 2. First up is the electrifying (literally) hidden gem, Murder by Phone—also known as Bells or The Calling.
The episode begins with the guys sharing their admiration for this underrated horror flick. Then, it’s time for the Retro Blood Weekly History Segment, where we discuss what was happening in the world of pro wrestling and metal music around the movie's release date, October 9, 1982.
For wrestling, the boys mix things up by recapping their live experience at AEW’s Dynamite: Fight for the Fallen on January 1, 2025, held in Asheville, NC. They share thoughts on the live event and delve into Asheville's pro wrestling history. In metal music, the spotlight is on Pagan Altar, a forgotten gem in the annals of metal history, and their unique contribution to the genre.
The discussion then shifts to the history of Murder by Phone. The guys explore the film’s Canadian setting, the work of director Michael Anderson (Logan’s Run, Orca), and the novel Phone Call that inspired the screenplay. They also highlight the eerie and atmospheric score by John Barry and the career of the legendary Richard Chamberlain, who stars as Nat Bridger.
Finally, James and Alison break down the movie itself, diving into its unique blend of environmental science, mystery, and killer technology. They discuss Lt. Meara’s memorable one-liners, Nat Bridger’s confusing side hustle as a painter, and the hilariously over-the-top phone-related deaths (phones that blow people away but don’t actually explode).
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Plug in, tune out, and make sure you answer the call for this thrilling start to 2025 with Retro Blood! 📞⚡ #RetroBlood #80sHorror #MurderByPhone #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic

Retro Blood 168: Child’s Play (1988)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison as we wrap up our Bad Kids and Even Badder Toys month this holiday season with the original Child’s Play (1988). This week, it’s all about the movie that introduced the world to Chucky, the possessed Good Guy doll with a murderous streak.
We kick things off with James explaining why he’s never been a fan of the Chucky franchise but still respects its legacy and impact on horror. The guys also finish up their Holiday Stout Reviews, bringing the month to a festive close.
In the Weekly History Segment, we dive into what was happening in the world of pro wrestling and metal music around Child’s Play’s release on November 9, 1988. For wrestling, James breaks down a Saturday Night’s Main Event from November 26, 1988, featuring a thrilling Macho Man Randy Savage vs. André the Giant match. In metal, J.H. Alison highlights the iconic death metal band Death and their groundbreaking album Leprosy.
Next, the guys discuss the history of Child’s Play, starting with Don Mancini’s original script, which featured blood rituals and a much darker tone. They explore Tom Holland’s role as director, his departure and return to the project, and the controversy over credit. Plus, they talk about writer John Lafia’s contributions and the unforgettable performance of Brad Dourif as the voice of Chucky.
Finally, the boys dive into a full review of the film, covering everything from the return of voodoo magic to Maggie’s shocking fall out the window. They discuss Karen’s hard-working, no-nonsense attitude, Andy’s desperate attempts to convince everyone that his doll is alive, and Chucky’s fiery, terrifying showdown when he’s burned and unstoppable. 
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End the year with a bang (or a slash) as we celebrate one of horror’s most iconic villains! 🔪🧸🎄 #RetroBlood #ChildsPlay #Chucky #80sHorror #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic

Retro Blood 167: Puppet Master (1989)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison for a special Retro Blood Christmas episode as we continue our Holiday Review Month, exploring 1980s horror movies with bad kids and even badder toys! This week, we dive into the cult classic Puppet Master (1989), where killer dolls take center stage.
First, James shares an interesting (and slightly baffling) comparison of Puppet Master to the original Hellraiser. Then, the guys continue their Holiday Stout Reviews, sampling festive brews to match the season.
Next, it’s the Weekly History Segment, where they dig into what was happening in the world of pro wrestling and metal music around Puppet Master’s release on October 12, 1989. In pro wrestling, they spotlight a mega house show featuring the epic clash between Macho King Randy Savage and Hulk Hogan. For metal, Alison dives into Voivod’s groundbreaking album NothingFace and its influence on the progressive metal scene.
The episode then explores the rich history of Puppet Master, focusing on Charles Band, the mastermind behind this Full Moon Productions flagship movie. They discuss why Puppet Master was created, the origin of its iconic title, and how the straight-to-VHS release strategy made this film a massive success.
Finally, the boys dive into a full review of the movie. They break down Frank and Carissa’s bizarre sex magic antics, Alex’s puzzling psychic visions, and the unforgettable roster of killer puppets—Pinhead, Blade, and the stomach-churning Leech Woman. They also discuss Neal, the ultimate heel of the story, and the creepy yet charming atmosphere that made this film a beloved cult classic.
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Celebrate Christmas Retro Blood style with killer puppets, VHS nostalgia, and a dash of holiday cheer! 🎄🤖🔪 #RetroBlood #PuppetMaster #80sHorror #HolidayHorror #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic

Retro Blood 166: The Pit (1981)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison as Retro Blood continues its Holiday Review Month, diving into 1980s horror movies featuring bad kids and even badder toys! This week, the boys tackle the bizarre movie The Pit (1981)—a movie packed with creepy teddy bears, awkward babysitters, and a pit full of hungry monsters.
The episode begins with James explaining why he thought this movie was a total misfire, while J.H. shares his own thoughts on its strange charm. Next, the guys continue their Holiday Stout Beer Review, diving into their latest festive picks.
In the Weekly History Segment, they explore what was happening in the worlds of metal and pro wrestling around The Pit’s release dates. For metal, they use the Canadian release date of October 23, 1981, to discuss Saxon’s legendary album Denim and Leather. They also talk about Saxon’s October 25, 1981, concert, featuring performances of new tracks like “Midnight Rider” and “Never Surrender.” On the wrestling side, they shift to the U.S. release date of June 4, 1983, spotlighting WCCW and a main event match for the vacant Texas Heavyweight Title between David Von Erich and Jimmy Garvin.
The boys then delve into the production history of The Pit, discussing writer Ian A. Stuart’s original story, how director Lew Lehman made significant (and strange) plot changes, and a peculiar story involving Lehman’s wife and daughter on set. They also chat about the film’s Canadian budget, its origins in the novel Teddy, and how the character of Jamie (aka Sammy Snyders) transitioned from disco dancing to unsettlingly creepy kid behavior.
Finally, it’s time for the full breakdown! They explore Jamie’s cringeworthy attempts to win over his babysitter, her complete incompetence as both a caretaker and therapist, and the many missed opportunities with the creepy teddy bear. They also highlight the film’s odd look, bizarre tone, the underwhelming "Tra-la-logs" in the pit, and the hilariously wooden acting by characters like Margret.
Join us for a dive into one of the weirdest 80s horror films this holiday season—because nothing says festive cheer like bad acting, awkward teen vibes, and a pit full of monsters! 🎄🧸👹 #RetroBlood #HolidayHorror #ThePit1981 #80sHorror #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic
 

Retro Blood 165: Dolls (1987)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison as Retro Blood continues its Holiday Review Month, delving into 1980s horror movies with bad kids and even badder toys! This week, the boys step into the twisted world of Dolls (1987), where an eerie old couple with a penchant for sinister toys transforms wicked family members into even wickeder dolls.
The episode kicks off with James and Alison’s quick thoughts on Dolls, including why J.H. Alison put his Blu-ray copy of the film up for sale on eBay after his first watch. The boys then continue their Holiday Beer Review series, diving into their second round of seasonal stouts.
In the Weekly History Segment, they explore what was happening in pro wrestling and metal music on April 27, 1987, the film’s release date. For metal, they spotlight Motörhead’s final date of their Orgasmatron tour, which took place just one day after Dolls hit theaters. On the wrestling side, they cover the iconic Memphis wrestling feud between Jerry "The King" Lawler and Austin Idol, culminating in their legendary Hair vs. Hair Steel Cage Match.
Next, they go behind the scenes with production notes on Dolls. They discuss Stuart Gordon’s direction, how he brought his family to the set during filming, and how his childhood fear of dolls inspired the movie. They also dive into the painstaking stop-motion animation process that brought the creepy little figures to life, showcasing why it was such a challenging yet integral part of the film’s eerie charm.
Finally, it’s time for the full review! They break down the film’s characters, from Judith, the surprisingly clever protagonist, to David and Rosemary, the awful dad and stepmom you love to hate. They’ll also talk about the hot but hilariously clueless British goth chicks, and of course, those terrifying little dolls that attack with gleeful malice.
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Get ready for toy terror, gothic vibes, and holiday cheer with this Retro Blood breakdown of Dolls! 🎄🪆 #RetroBlood #HolidayHorror #Dolls1987 #80sHorror #StoutBeer #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic
 

Retro Blood 164: The Children (1980)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison as Retro Blood kicks off its Holiday Review Month, exploring 1980s horror movies featuring bad kids and even badder toys! This week, the boys make their first stop in Ravensback to break down the nuclear nightmare that is The Children.
The episode opens with some quick thoughts on the film, praising its intriguing concept but calling out its uneven execution. The boys also start their Holiday Beer Reviews with a selection of seasonal stouts—because what’s holiday horror without a good brew? 🍺
In the Weekly History Segment, they dive into what was happening in the world of pro wrestling and metal music around the film’s release. For pro wrestling, they head to June 6, 1980, and discuss the New Japan Pro Wrestling Madison Square Garden League Finals, a pivotal tournament for the promotion. On the metal side, they jump to September 26, 1980, to talk about Queen’s iconic frontman Freddie Mercury and how his legendary look was taking shape during this era.
Next, the boys go behind the scenes with some production notes on The Children. They explore co-writer Carlton J. Albright’s creative influence, the drama surrounding his decision to hire Max Kalmanowicz as director, and Albright’s use of his own kids as the creepy, black-nailed zombie children. They also dig into the wild stories of Martin, the on-set drug dealer, and wonder aloud if every 1980s horror film required one! Plus, they discuss the film’s unexpected popularity at Arizona drive-in theaters, where lines were backed up for blocks.
Finally, it’s time for the full review. From the radioactive zombie goth kids to Sheriff Bill Hart’s hilariously inept policing, they cover it all. They discuss Jackson the jacked dude, the prevalence of J-names in the film, and why John might just be the true MVP of this chaotic story. 
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Get ready for some small-town scares and holiday fun with the Retro Blood crew! Streaming now. 🎄🩸 #RetroBlood #HolidayHorror #TheChildren1980 #ZombieKids #StoutBeer #ProWrestlingHistory #MetalMusic

Retro Blood 163: Cannibal Holocaust (1980)

Join James Kline and J.H. Alison as Retro Blood wraps up its Thanksgiving month of “Human Meat: What’s for Dinner?” with one of the most controversial and notorious films of all time—Cannibal Holocaust!
The boys kick things off by exploring the Italian cannibal film boom of the 1980s, debating whether this gruesome flick could be considered the first-ever found footage movie. They set the stage with a dive into the history of what was happening in metal and pro wrestling during the film’s release dates.
For metal, we flashback to February 7, 1980, to discuss the early days of the Ramones, their impact on punk and metal crossover, and their status as underground legends at the time. On the pro wrestling side, we fast-forward to Cannibal Holocaust’s U.S. release on June 19, 1985, where we break down a WWF house show in the wake of WrestleMania I, featuring Hulk Hogan and Paul Orndorff squaring off against Rowdy Roddy Piper and Bob Orton!
Next, we dive deep into the film’s production history and controversies. Hear all about director Ruggero Deodato’s infamous arrest for making this shocking movie, his disdain for sensationalist news media that inspired the film’s brutal themes, and how Italy’s Red Brigades influenced its creation. We also delve into Robert Kerman’s fascinating dual career as a leading man in both exploitation and adult films, cementing his legacy as the “Cannibal King.”
Finally, we dive into the full review of this raw and unrelenting film. From Professor Harold Monroe recording tribal sounds (and eating raw meat) to the Allen crew faking atrocities for shock value only to face their ultimate reckoning, we break down the chaos, carnage, and deeper messages lurking in the jungle.
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Prepare for a blood-soaked exploration of exploitation cinema’s darkest corners. Streaming now! 🩸🌴 #RetroBlood #CannibalHolocaust #HumanMeatMonth #ItalianHorror #FoundFootage #WWFHistory #Ramones
 

Retro Blood 162: Cannibal Apocalypse / Cannibals in the Streets (1980)

James Kline and J.H. Alison are back with another wild entry for Retro Blood’s “Human Meat: What’s for Dinner?” month, diving into the gritty chaos of Cannibal Apocalypse (also known as Cannibals in the Streets). This week, join the boys as they break down John Saxon’s unforgettable (and somewhat regret-filled) performance as Norman Hopper, from his rabid cannibal instincts to his unconventional biting down low.
In this week’s history segment, we revisit the metal and pro wrestling landscape around August 4, 1980. In metal, we dig into Judas Priest’s skyrocketing popularity on their current tour, solidifying them as heavyweights in the burgeoning heavy metal scene. For pro wrestling, we cover the heated rivalry between Bruno Sammartino and Larry Zbyszko, culminating in their legendary cage match on this very night!
Then, the boys go behind the scenes of Cannibal Apocalypse, discussing the various titles, the Atlanta filming location, and director Antonio Margheriti’s knack for recycling footage. Plus, they explore John Saxon’s mixed feelings about the film and how he made the role his own.
Finally, we launch into a full review featuring Saxon shirtless and chomping down, rabid cannibal attacks, the ever-tense Lt. Hill, and the “joy trail” scene that has to be heard to be believed.
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Streaming now on all platforms! 🩸🍽️ #RetroBlood #CannibalApocalypse #HumanMeatMonth #JohnSaxon #HeavyMetalHistory #ProWrestlingCageMatch